In my last post I mentioned a dear friend that had received news that she had breast cancer. I couldn't fix her diagnosis but I wanted her to know that I care so I decided to make her a care package. Firstly, I got in touch with her husband and asked him the following questions:
Whats her favourite colour?
What is she reading at the moment?
Any special tea, coffee or chocolate she likes?
Anything I should I know
He responded with, she is not a "girly girl" no pink or candles or oils. Favourite colour is Sage green, loves herbal teas, loves reading on her kindle and that was basically it. So I went online and did a little research onto the effects of chemo and read up a bit more on breast cancer. One of the things that happens after treatment is you feel very nauseous and you get very dry lips. You also lose your hair.
So with this in mind I set out to collect things for my care parcel. Now you can go as big or small as you like. The point is the thoughtfulness by giving such a gift. My box was filled as follows:
A large empty box - I made a little poster which I stuck on the box that read
"I hope this little box of stuff, brightens your day, is useful, brings joy, shows you how much we care, how much you are loved and that you are never alone.
With all our love and support,
Jen and Family"
The contents of my box was as follows:
Hand cream (I also read you get very dry hands)
Lip ice and lip creme
Ginger biscuits for nausea
I had a little crochet elephant made - the old saying goes "Elephants never forget" so I attached a little card that said elephants never forget and you must never forget to fight. I also added that Ele was her new BFF if she ever needed a hug.
Some head scarves. I knew she had lost her hair and that this was a very traumatic thing for her as she once had the most beautiful, thick naturally long curly hair. So I went back onto the internet and googled different ways to wear your scarf. I got a few ideas, printed them out and added them with the scarf.
A journal - its important to write down your journey and your emotions. Sometimes its hard to talk about it so journalling is an opportunity to get it off your chest.
Sanitiser - a small handbag size
A small roll on perfume for her bag
A pretty purse with some money in for a coffee at the Hospital
And a bought her a piece of jewllery with the Chai symbol on it. Chai means to life - we celebrate those who have passed but its also a reminder that this life is precious and we should always to choose to live.
The other thing I did was a got a journal for her husband and each of her kids. They were going through this too. They needed an outlet too.
She was so touched by this thoughtful parcel and said many of the items were so helpful after her chemo sessions. She particularly liked the printouts on how to wear a head scarf and told me that Ele accompanies her to each chemo session.
I felt good knowing that this care parcel was well received and had helped in a small way. When friends are going through struggles often the people closest to you are so upset that instead of being there they become distant - they don't know how to fix it or what to say so they do and say nothing. This is incredibly hurtful and leaves the person feeling alone and wondering what they did. Its better to say "I don't know what to say" then to not say anything. Kindness always wins. SO be kind, be a friend and you're thoughtful messages and package will make all the difference.